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Saturday, July 4, 2015

Celebrity Cidiots

Ever wondered what type of cidiot some of your favorite celebrities are?  According to cheatsheet.com, our top five who've made recent news and tweets, are "Bad Drivers" .....and they know it!

Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson made recent tweets about sideswiping a pickup truck that was parked on the street. According to The Little Handbook for Navigationally Challenged Cidiots, Johnson would be defined as The Sketch Artist. In the handbook, The Sketch Artist is a cidiot who prides themselves by driving extremely close to parked vehicles while giving each driver side door a free sample of their finest art work. While he may not pride himself in giving that poor pickup truck a free sample of his finest art work and tearing off the mirror, Johnson definitely fits the bill. Instead of a stage 5 Sketch Artist, perhaps he's a Stage 2. Ben Afleck seemed to have tied with The Rock this week, committing the same offense in Santa Monica when he knocked someone's car mirror off. But I have to give them both credit; they owned up to the fact they are Celebrity Cidiots on the road.

Eva Longoria could possibly be the amplified version of The Reckless Rembrandt. Instead of leaving a nasty mark on the parked vehicle's door, she left a nasty mark on a parked vehicle's hood and front grill when she backed into it while trying to make her exodus from the parking lot. Ohhhh that had to hurt.

Kylie Jenner gets the honors of being put in the  Hubub The Flub category, not because she ended up in her neighbor's flowerbed shortly after getting the keys to her parents' car; but simply because she caused a 3 car pileup.

It seems as though Parking is just not one of those driving techniques that celebrities have mastered. Selena Gomez's car ended up in another person's fender on a 7-11 parking lot. She could possibly be defined as The Reckless Rembrandt with Sketch Artist tendencies.



The Little Handbook for Navigationally Challenged Cidiots

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